Ryanair warm beer and cold tea in a plastic mug in a fools paradise

RYANAIR TO INSTALL VENDING MACHINES ONBOARD

AND REDUCE CABIN CREW TO LOWER COSTS

Ryanair, the world’s favourite airline, has announced that it will install vending machines onboard its 225 aircraft in a drive to further reduce costs and increase ancillary revenues through increased passenger choice.  From June 2010 Ryanair passengers will be able to purchase hot and cold drinks, sandwiches, snacks, ice-cream, condoms and smokeless cigarettes directly from onboard vending machines.

Ryanair said that the phased installation of vending machines will allow it to reduce its cabin crew teams onboard from four to two who will perform safety announcements and ensures passenger seatbelts are securely fastened.  The substantial savings which this initiative will generate will then be passed on to the travelling public in the form of lower fares.

Ryanair’s Stephen McNamara said:

“Ryanair is delighted to announce the installation of our onboard vending machines which will provide passengers with an extensive choice of in-flight snacks and drinks, allowing Ryanair to reduce crew members, lower costs and pass on lower fares to the travelling public.

“We are confident that our self-service vending machines and our more efficient cabin crew teams will prove popular this summer.�

Perhaps the gifting of sambos and tea that the Ryanair strike beakers served the BA passengers last week made them have a change of heart. 

Pretending your vending wont get you trending this April 1st. 

Question 1. for any reporter taken in, how many vending machines does it take to fill hangar six.